Not Good With Titles

Jojo left his home in tucson, arizona

2007-01-06T23:15:00.000+01:00

As you can all see I haven't blogged for ages but I figure no one reads this now so I can start again without fear anyone will actually read it. Clever huh?

Anyway in the last few months I have moved house and been on lots of exciting adventures and sometimes I have been awake as well. My new surroundings have taken time to get used to but I kind of like living alone and we shall see what the future holds.

Everton have been doing what Everton do although we have fewer players that are crap and the potential is there we just need to believe and play the bloody game.

Work isn't so bad although I seem to be mad busy at the moment and thats both good as the days go quickly and bad as there isn't enough time. Catch 22. Talk about a seemless link I am reading Catch 22 at the moment and it is potentially my favourite book ever. I'm not one for all that ridiculous "couldn't put the book down" nonsense but this book makes me laugh. I like cynicism its good for the soul.

I'm going to be a bit random in my thoughts because I have missed so many months out but I may dip back into that period depending on how I feel.

Just a few comments on today I took Kendra back to the airport and for details of her trip read her blog because she does it far better and with more photos. It was a different post-Christmas / New Year period but I went to places that are nearby that I probably wouldn't have otherwise and had fun although I still want to see the laser show. Bastards. Oh and Nick Barmby is a cunt. You know what it means.

In other news theres not much news about so the fact we don't know how many prisoners are on the run is news. So what? If you don't keep certain figures its nearly impossible to make up accurate figures on request without implementing a whole new system. They are better spending their time actually chasing the people.

In sport news Andy Murray lost in a final and the Red Shite also lost. Not before mass demonstrations regarding Kelvin MacKenzie repeating the lies that he printed years ago. Now don't get me wrong I am all for Justice for the 96 but surely there are some families that struggle to move on due to constant reminders. I don't know being an Evertonian I will be accused of bitterness but Heysel, the Bradford Fire and the like were also terrible tradgedys but ultimately people have to move on. Liverpool as a city was accused of being a Victim city and maybe with all the changes that are occuring physically in Liverpool there should be a psychological change to look forward. The city is going places and no one will ever forget but maybe now it is time to focus on the future.

New car, caviar, four star daydream,

2006-07-18T21:29:00.000+01:00

Look at that money! Its all mine... Due to the inability to buy Belarussian Roubles outside of Belarus I have to take American Dollars and Euros when I go on Friday. I will be gone from Friday until Sunday the 31st so you wont have this dose of excitement in your lives for some time.

I have to go to Preston tomorrow night when Everton are playing there but I am not going to see them. I'm not sure whether thats ironic or just annoying but either way theres not much I can do about it.

Just think of all the tales I will have of Milan and Minsk and Mir when I come back? All the Ms.

but when they come for me, bury me a G

2006-07-16T22:21:00.000+01:00

I have never heard the song but it has Bury in the title ok? So I went yesterday for the Everton game and it was a good day all round really. A nice sunny day and the football wasn't too bad even if Mikel Arteta barely broke a sweat (he still looked the best player on the pitch!). Overall it was a good laugh with a pitch invasion led by toddlers and a decent atmosphere in the crowd.

Special bonus points to Bury's 3-in-one programme for all their Pre-season games. Perhaps the most significant performance was that of Victor Anichbe who scored two of the goals in the 3-1 win and must now be pushing for a place on the bench.

I'm sure if you want a detailed match report you can find it elsewhere. Its now only four working days until I go to Belarus and I am getting a little excited. Packing day is Wednesday and I think I have everything sorted and ready now so... bring it on. When I come back my first task is to order a laptop and all systems go for moving house. So many things happening and so little time!

Our aspirations, are wrapped up in books

2006-07-11T23:25:00.000+01:00

Yes folks its time for a Book Review! Oh boy aren't you all in for a treat. Following on from my hugely succesful previous blog I have now finished reading Stuart: A Life Backwards.

First of all I must say I agree with Stuart when he said how the book should be written backwards like a mystery. It is this format which makes the book something slightly special among things I have read. I must admit I started off wondering why I should feel any sympathy with this man and I particularly disliked the author who seemed a complete arse. By the end it left me wondering how else someone could turn out after experiencing everything Stuart went through. The last few chapters of the book are both awful and amazing at the same time and gave me another of those wake up calls you get now and again when you realise how simple your own life has been.

The way it is written is perhaps the only way it could be and its strange how easy it is to see how you could be friends with this man who had done so many horrendous things. I almost urge you to go into this book with prejudice. Try and hate this man over the opening chapters and see where your opinion is at the end. There is both hope and hopelessness in equal measure from Stuart's story but I for one feel a better person for having read it.

I still don't like the author though.

For a lighter note have a look at Tim Cahill (watch right to the end). Legend.

Hey shout, summertime blues

2006-07-10T21:55:00.000+01:00

Today feels like a list day folks so in honour of Zinedine Zidane (every single time a winner that gag) I am going to do a list of top alternative moments from the World Cup.

1. De Rossi's elbow on Brian Mcbride.

2. Gattuso. No actual incident just him.

3. Ricardo La Volpe and his Tie especially.

4. While we are on coaches Otto Pfister haha!

5. Amarillo, 3 Lions and all the English Songs sung at the matches - whats that all about?

6. Jermaine Jenas

7. World Cup Totty (as opposed to Totti who was shit).

8. Frank Lampard.

9. Ex-players hanging around but no sign of Johan Cruyff. Wheres Cruyff?

10. Martin O'Neill - Just brilliant.

Thinking about History

2006-07-09T14:18:00.000+01:00

This blog thing is becoming more a weekly exercise now isn't it? And anyway no bugger reads it so theres hardly floods of complaints.

I am just settling down to watch Federer v Nadal before the World Cup Final this evening. By the way why does Jimmy Connors make that grunting sound at the end of every point? I read in FHM that hes one of the most regular attenders at Playboy parties which puts a whole new slant on it.

Two interesting things for you today. First France and in particular Zinedine Zidane the country is messed up but I love that fella and Thierry Henry is also brilliant if only for his interview after the Pires Penalty. See the videos here, here and for the Pires one well... er I can't find it.

Second up History Matters. I could try and explain all this but lets face it I can never put as well as Stephen Fry.

Also identical twins running Poland haha brilliant!

See these ice cubes, see these Ice Creams?

2006-07-03T23:41:00.000+01:00

ITS TOO BLOODY HOT! I seriously can't cope with this heat at work... I may go insane. On the plus side who would have thunk I would get Snoop Dogg lyrics on here?

So England out of the world cup, the Cricket team unable to win anything, Murray out of Wimbledon and Kieron Fallen charged. Possibly not the greatest period in British sporting history. I wonder nowadays how much affect this actually has on the public mood as people used to claim about the mythical "feelgood factor". The people I know seem to not overly care either way but maybe thats among adults rather than children. I remember in 1990 being gutted at England going out but my thoughts this time are mostly on how good the football is to watch and when the real stuff starts. Maybe its an age thing?

It appears to be work experience week this week so we have lots of people younger than me around work (a rare thing for me). I wouldn't swap with them for anything... I think I am just approaching the best part of my life.

Remember boy that your forefather's died, Lost in millions for a country's pride

2006-07-02T23:38:00.000+01:00

So I have neglected this Blog a bit lately and I apologise. I would like to say I have been very busy but in truth I have been reading lots and doing very little.

So first things first my books I bought four books in the end because Amsterdam by Ian McEwen wasn't in the offer and I really wanted it. I read Saturday recently and loved it not least for the fact it made me genuinely question myself which surely is all you can ask from a book of this type?

The next book I bought was The Kite Runner and I don't really have a reason why other than I read a few reviews and it seemed like a book outside what I would normally read so I thought I would give it a go. Third on my list was Stuart:A Life Backwards, I wanted a non-fiction book and didn't really fancy any of the "celebrity" auto-biographies so I looked at this and it fascinated me just from what it was about. I have started reading this first but only got through a few pages so I will reserve judgement for now but it seems promising.

The last book was A Long Way Down by Nick Hornby. I have always avoided Nick Hornby because (for no justifiable reason) I have assumed he is a bit of a twat. I love the About a Boy film though and the soundtrack by Badly Drawn Boy is amazing. Buy it. Now. I mean it. So on that one we shall see.

FOOTBALL INTERLUDE - England got knocked out but that means Red Shite count in the world cup is now nil and Evertonian count is one? There are links with 1966 there in that Portugal were the team of that tournament and the winning team had an Everton full-back.

Altogether now... GO 'HEAD NUNO LAAAAAAAAAA!!!

And onto more serious matters which is what the title of this is all about (although incidentally the Altogether Now theme links to Everton... if you dont know how then look for it). Due to football and other matter the rememberance of The Somme has been overlooked also the fact that WW1 Veterans are so few now that it will shortly be the case there are none left. Better people than me can discuss the reasons and people can argue we should have allowed Germany its empire but we must never forget these great men and what they did for our nation. In an age when wars are distant things that appear on TV there should always be a place to remember the real people involved and the amazing sacrifices that were made. If you want to see true heros look down your street or in your local British Legions. This country is teeming with them.

Don't ask me what I want it for (Aahh Mr. Wilson)

2006-06-27T23:26:00.000+01:00

So I sat down and tried to figure out how much I could afford in rent for my new house. The depressing thing is how much tax I have to pay and for a minute there I sat complaining about it. Then I realised I needed to get a grip... we can all talk about inequalities in life but at the end of the day the benefits you get from paying tax is the society in which we live. Now I am not claiming that we live in some Utopia but when someone like Josephine Rooney gets treated as hero it annoys me.

The Poll Tax riots were actually about something and I have no doubt about the problems that this woman had to put up with but how does she expect this to help? These issues do have to be highlighted and I'm sure everyone is agreed that action need to be taken but at the end of the day there are better ways to go about it.

You know I wrote all the above yesterday and wasn't eloquent enough to express how I felt. Anyway the punchline came today when it turns out the woman was feeding the people on her street and effectively making them stay there rather than seek help.

I felt rubbish before and now I feel great so I am going to buy some books and look for new home... more on my purchases as I get them.

Too much history coming down, Another building brought to ground

2006-06-26T23:34:00.000+01:00

Hello Blog readers! Its the end of another Monday and we are rolling through another week it will soon be Christmas. Today I got my job stuff sort of sorted although there were the inevitable hitches and I'm sure I will have to keep trying and pushing myself forward in order to get where I want to be.

On a lighter note I had some chocolate m&ms today which I don't seem to be able to find in any shops anymore these days but were provided by some wonderful person. Admittedly it wasn't actually Duncan Ferguson but someone also as good but without the heading ability and random violent tendecies. Actually scratch that last bit - you know who you are!

I was also thinking more about finding a place to live today and I really need to get my finger out of my arse. On this theme I also need to sit down and figure out how much I can afford but if I don't get my pay rise until next month then I am away it seems pointless now until I come back. Am I just putting it off?

Wimbledon started today and it rained. Well they wanted some down south didn't they and yet they still bloody moan. I'm not a great fan of Tennis but I always have time for Martina Hingis and Kim Clijsters and lets face it theres always the excuse to watch posh people get excited over strawberrries and cream.

Is it worth the aggravation

2006-06-24T17:58:00.000+01:00

In a step away from my talking about how I am lazy today I provide you with a list of wonderful lazy things I have done in my lifetime:

1. Used a Post-It note when picking my nose instead of getting a tissue.
2. Worn no socks because they were upstairs.
3. Drove my car to the shops which are five minutes walk away for a paper (regular occurance).
4. Not answered the door at 11am when I was awake in bed but couldn't be bothered standing up.

Hmm I can't think of more but I am sure I have lots... more as I think of them.

This town is for the counterfeit dreamers

2006-06-23T15:54:00.000+01:00

I stayed up until about 5am reading last night because I didn't feel at all sleepy. I have always been a night person to be honest. If people wanted to get the most out of me at work they should put me on a 10pm to 6am shift because my brain seems to work better then. Anyway it was starting to get light as I went to sleep and the birds were waking up which is kind of a nice way to go to sleep. I couldn't imagine living in a city and having to sleep with traffic noise and the like outside it would just feel strange. I always feel claustrophobic in cities I'm sure its not how humans were designed to live at all.

I was reading something the other day about architecture (yes really) and how buildings were all the same these days and I think cities are particularly bad for this but especially industrial estates. We seem to have the best architects in the world in this country yet somehow feel imagination is only needed for the more high-profile buildings. Some of the buildings that have gone up in recent years I think are amazing not least the Gherkin. Also the redevelopment of Manchester (particularly Salford Quays) and now Liverpool (despite the fourth grace fiasco) has been good for the cities but it hasn't stopped the creating of more and more out of town shopping centres which are ugly horrible places that always depress me. I am not saying we should all live in futuristic buildings and in some places they would look ridiculous but surely some thought could go into the spaces people spend significant amounts of their lives? I think the environment can have a massive affect on peoples behaviour and attitude and with a little thought it could be a better looking and nicer place to live.

And all the people would smile and skip to work.. haha. I don't know its just a thought isn't it?

She measures everything in Metric

2006-06-22T23:35:00.000+01:00

A special treat for you tonight with my Everton shirt that came out today and I received today despite being ordered after the deadline. A rare time of Everton being ahead of the game.

Anyway I fear there may be Everton overkill on here at the moment so I am going to discuss other matters from..... wait for it..... NOW!

I've been kind of bored today but still not bored enough to tidy all my crap up. I also need to ring CIPFA and the Evil Empire who seem to be waiting for my warranty to run out before telling me I can't have a replacement for my broken remote. Its not going to work though because I am in the mood to shout at someone at the moment.

Its not long now until I go to Belarus (the first link for Belarus is from the CIA haha read the bit about Government Type). I am starting to look forward to it now as with work and study I haven't left the country for a few years and it should be fun. I would explain all the reasons for it but its a long story and will probably come out in bits and bobs during these posts anyway.

Cos I Love to live so pleasantly, Live this life of luxury

2006-06-22T14:40:00.000+01:00

Ok so its not sunny but it is afternoon and I am lazing so just get off my back right or I will send the heavies round. So the fixtures came out today and Everton "entertain" Watford on the opening day of the season in a repeat of the 1984 FA Cup Final. We won 2-0 and Elton John cried which I think you can agree pretty much is the definition of a great day. More worringly Everton play Chelsea on the last day of the season so lets hope we don't need anything from them games. We have Middlesbrough (seriously you should look at that link its amusing) and the barcodes over Christmas both at home which is always a good break from eating stupid amounts of food and farting. The closest fixture to my birthday (26th April fact fans) is Manchester United PLC so that should be fun huh?

My nephew is here today causing trouble as usual. He has just been telling me how Ronaldinho is his favourite player now which is progress from Beckham I guess. When he was first born I started getting him Everton shirts but now others have corrupted him and hes more a Wigan fan. What can you do eh? Anyway we are going to watch Italy v Czech Republic now although depending what happens I may watch Ghana instead.

Still no plans for anything to do and suggestions are welcomed.

One moment of patience may ward off great disaster. One moment of impatience may ruin a whole life

2006-06-21T17:57:00.000+01:00

I just stole the title of this post from a site that claims it is a Chinese proverb and I have no reason to believe it isn't true. I don't want to get too morbid but the reason why the road I usually used yesterday was because of a serious accident. From the sound of the article it suggests that the people in the car might have had something to hide but no one deserves that kind of think. It just makes you think when you get annoyed because of a slight delay in getting home when something like that has happened. The road is a terrible one anyway its poorly maintained and people go at stupid speeds on it because it is quite wide but it still makes you stop and think. I drive past here ten times a week and I just know that in a few weeks I will have forgotten this happened but its just another thing to remind people that you don't need to get anywhere THAT quickly.

On to a happier note and I am off for the next two days. Not sure what to do yet but if I think of anything I will be sure to let you all (I say all.. its just Kendra really) know.

All I can say is that my life is pretty plain

2006-06-20T23:43:00.000+01:00

Theres kind of a running theme with these titles isn't there? Today is a particularly good one I feel. Anyway I made it back alive from Manchester where it was raining as usual but I guess Manchester wouldn't be the place it is today without its climate. That doesn't help you much when overtaking a HGV on the M62 and gripping the steering wheel for dear life! To be honest I have had a traffic nightmare all day and without sounding like Eddie from Early Doors the road I usually drive home from work on was shut by the Police so I was stuck in traffic for hours.

So anyway I watched England. It was dull. I think that covers it doesn't it really? My mate seemed reasonably happy and we talked about meeting up for another match but we shall see. I'm not very good at making the effort when I know that I should do really because I much prefer it when I actually do stuff.

I am in work tomorrow and then I have Thursday and Friday off to watch football and catch up on sleep. I may finally get round to sorting out my CIPFA stuff now it is all done with and I can sit back and decide what I want to do next. Priority is to get my job sorted and then find a new place to live which is proper hard work but I know will make me much happier when I can slob about in my own place. Even talking about it tires me out to be honest. I shall leave it here for tonight.. goodnight y'all.

Altogether Now

2006-06-19T23:32:00.000+01:00

So Saxondale wasn't that bad and if I remember I might even watch it next week although my memory is currently on a par with a Goldfish. Tomorrow night is a rare night in that I am going out to my mates to see England play Sweden. This match could feature three (yes three!) ex-Evertonians and as part of my build up I shall give you the lowdown on these massively talented individuals.

First up we shall deal with the fat lad. To be honest pretty much all I have to say is summed up here with possibly the greatest final line in the history of fat lad articles.

On to the Swedes and Messers Linderoth and Alexandersson. Its fair to say neither set the world alight at Goodison and frankly were terrible but I still kind of like Tobias and his dull passing style that makes you wonder whether hes awake. I saw Alexandersson more in the reserves at Southport than I did in the first team but he seemed out of his depth playing alongside such reserve legends as Chopra, Eagles and sundry other people who seem to never quite make it.

I got paid yesterday so I have money for a few days at least so I may go wild and purchase some books. Any recommendations will be considered and then ignored as I go for whatever takes my fancy when I get on Amazon. Don't let that put you off suggesting though, all comments will be read and I promise to only snigger behind your backs. I'm nice like that.

Tony "call me Tony" Blair was on 606 tonight discussing all things football and world cup. Now I don't know what it is but as a person I can't help but like the fella. I think overall its a shame that the whole Labour time in power will probably be defined by the Iraq war which was a situation from which I don't think there was any solution that could be called the correct one. I have always had difficulty reconciling my own thoughts about the war and was helped a lot by reading Saturday by Ian McEwan which kind of expressed my thoughts better than I can through its central character. Who really knows what the best decision was?

And now I am discussing Iraq rather than the whole Labour spell of power. I guess its inevitable but I do think Labour has improved the country as a whole. Is the country better now than it was in 1997? I tend to think so and over the coming years the massive investment in the NHS will hopefully begin to bare fruit. Its only by recognising how bad it was before that you realise how much it has improved. Now I don't claim everything is terrific and there haven't been mistakes but the thought of David Cameron or Ming in power? That scares me a hell of a lot more than re-electing Labour. All this and the fella only said he felt that Australia played quite well!

Its nearly sleep time now so I will leave you with my quote of the day:

"The greatest of faults, I should say, is to be conscious of none" Thomas Carlyle

Cock Piss Partridge

2006-06-19T17:13:00.000+01:00

I'm a bit weary today with a cough that just won't go and eyes that struggled to stay open at work. I'm not generally an ill person to be honest and don't think I have had a day off School/College/Uni/Work since I was at Primary School. I can't decide whether that is a good thing or makes me a bit sad that I have never chucked a sickie. Anyway no doubt it will disappear like Bird Flu and Sars which were going to kill everybody but now seem to be less of a threat than Marcus Bent.

Today I have mostly been annoyed by people driving 40mph in national speed limit areas. This is surely as dangerous as people speeding because it causes anger among other drivers and leads people to do something stupid. I drive through the countryside a bit on my way to work and somedays I really want to scream at people.

Lets have something less depressing now. I am looking forward to Saxondale tonight because there isn't much good new comedy at the moment and I always hope Coogan will be as funny as he is in Alan Partridge. I guess he always hopes that too and there is always the pressure on to produce it must be almost frustrating to the point that you don't want huge success with something as you are stuck with it. Actually fuck them they earn loads of money from this stuff I'm sure they can live with a bit of pressure.

Anyway I will be back with my in depth review later. If I remember.

All You Good Good People Listen To Me

2006-06-18T23:16:00.000+01:00

Well hello there pop pickers. Another weekend over and back to the coal face tomorrow for the daily grind. Ahem its a hard life eh?

So whats troubling me today folks? I just read an interview with Thom Yorke in the Observer Music Monthly which focuses mainly environmental and political issues which affect both him and his music. Now I will be honest here I have never been a big Radiohead fan (although I found myself singing along to Creep the other day... it scared me) and I am never very sure about any singer who can't spell Tom or York but after this interview I kind of like him more. I understand how it frustrates him that he knows how he would like things to be but can't see a clear way of it happening. Surely most people in life can relate to that?

I read the Observer every week now in an attempt to read something other than The Mirror which, lets be honest, is hardly a deep thinking paper. Anyway my issue with the Observer is it takes me too long to read and I find myself reading articles about Isabella Rossalini that I would't even think of reading normally. I have this isssue with magazines as well where I have to read them in order from the start and if I want to read an article later on I read all the bits in between just to get there. I'm starting to come across as borderline insane now aren't I? Whats that you say? Not even borderline? Now I am hearing voices....

Anyway I shall end now and get ready for the week ahead. Car keys, watch, wallet with £2.30 for car park and phone all set up for when I wake up. You know me and David Beckham don't seem that familiar but we might just be eh? That by the way I hope is the only Daily Mail article I ever link to. In fact don't even click on it because theres bound to be some "get those foreigners out of our country story" linked to it. Where was I? Oh yeah I'm going... cya folks.

Turning Japanese

2006-06-18T14:22:00.000+01:00

They are on the telly now and I thought at least the titles of these things could be witty eh? Anyhow I had a nice lie in this morning and refused to get up for the idiot who knocked on the door constantly for about 20 minutes. I'm not a morning person.

So plans for today are pretty much read the paper and watch football again along with that difficult task of getting petrol. I now can't buy petrol without buying Midget Gems. Is that obsessive compulsive behaviour or just being a fat git? The important questions in life that are never answered by politicians eh? One day when I am PM I shall have an independent inquiry into all of this and it won't be just an excuse to get free Midget Gems at all.

So what will today bring? I was feeling kind of down last night so maybe I will get a surge of energy today but I wouldn't bet on it folks. I am now off to read about all things Everton and will leave you with the wonders that is Goodison Park...

So I have a blog now?

2006-06-18T00:08:00.000+01:00

I really just wanted to post on someone elses blog and now I have one of my own. Anyway I am not going to tell anyone about this but hopefully I will manage to keep up to date with it. I will warn you now not to expect much excitement or thrilling tales of white water rafting but there may be cautious warnings of pooing and white shorts.

Important stuff people.

Anyway to start off our journey into my world lets discuss today shall we? Are you sitting comfortably? I did nothing at all. Didn't even put my socks on so I didn't leave the house. The World Cup is on so I have some excuse but I would be lieing if I said that wasn't a normal Saturday anyway.

Anyhow I want to put a pic in here so lets....